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Saturday, January 9, 2010

FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 18


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Astronomers say
“The universe is Finite…”
Which is a comforting
Thought
For those people ,
Who cannot remember
Where they leave Things


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Husband: You know,
our son got his brain from me.

Wife: I think he did ,
I still got mine with me!


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


When I was born
Devil said…Oh Shit!!!
Another GOOD PERSON!!!..
&
When u were born devil said …
Oh Shit!!!!Competition…!!! ….


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Have a horrible day without water in ur bathroom,
while soap in ur eyes.
Oh!sorry, dis msg is not 4 u.
Its only 4 those who do not take bath everyday…


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


What’s the diff between Dava & Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend,
that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


If you need advice,
text me…
If you need a friend,
call me…
If you need me,
come to me…
But
If you need money.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Man:Doctor ! My Son has swallowed a key.
Doctor: When ?
Man:Three Months Ago
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Man: We were using duplicate key


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


7 Angels came 2 Me
&
asked 4 the most Inteligent,
Smart, Nice, Sweet,
Noble and Well Groomed Person.
So I gave Them Your Address
.
.
.
.
..
Dekha kesa Ullu banaya Un ko!:D





FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 17


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


TEACHER: Arshad, name one important thing
we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.

Arshad: Me!


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


I wrote your name on sand,
it got washed.

I wrote your name in air,
it was blown away.

I wrote your name on my heart &
i got Heart Attack.


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Our friendship means a lot to me.
U cry i cry.
U laugh i laugh.
U jump out of the window
I look down & then
.
.
.
I laugh again


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


The 1st Advice Of
Father To His Son
When Son Got His
Driving License Made,
Is
“Remember 1 Thing Son
If U’re Going To Hit
Anything, Make Sure
Its Cheap”


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


A recently fired
stock trader said …

“This is worse than divorce…
I have lost everything
and
I still have my wife…”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Man 1:
“I m Always Delighted
When People Stick Their
Noses In My
Business.”

Man 2:
“Why, What Do You Do?”

Man 1:
“i’ve A Company, Make
Tissue Papers …” ;->


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


What Happens When
The Elephant Sat On
The Mercedes Car … ???
.
.
.
.
Everyone Knows
“The Mercedes bends” ;->


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Girlfriend: And are you sure
you love me and no one else?

Boyfriend: Dead Sure!
I checked the whole list again yesterday





FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 16


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Full form of maths

M=mentally
A=admited
T=teacher
H=harassing
S=students


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


If ur world is spinning around
and
ur heart is beating fast..
Do u think its love?
?
?
?
Na Munna Na
it’s called High Blood Pressure:p.


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


True Love is like a pillow.
U could HUG it when Ur in trouble.
U could CRY on it when Ur in pain.
U could EMBRACE it when Ur happy.
Want True Love?
Spend Rs.50 buy a Pillow.


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Q: Do u knw y in a couple’s photo
man is on d right side & woman on d left?
A: Coz as per balance sheet,Liabilities r on d
Left Side & Assets on d Right!


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Tom : How should I convey the
news to my father that I’ve failed?

David: You just send a telegram:
Result declared, past year’s performance repeated.


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Girlfriend & Police
Main Kia Baat Common Hay ???
.
.
.
.
.
socho !
.
.
.
.
.
.
socho !
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aur Socho !
.
.
.
.
Donoo Hi Paisa Kha Kr
Chor Dete Hain !:p


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Three ants find an elephant asleep.
One says,”We’ll kill him!”
Other one says,”We’ll break his legs!”
3rd one says:
“choro yaar bechara akela hai aur hum teen..!!”:-)


 

FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 15


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Father to son:
whenever i beat you,
you dont get annoyed,
how you control your anger?

son: i start cleaning the toilet
seat with your toothbrush


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


What is a girl friend?

Addition of problems,
subtraction of money,
multiplication of enemies
&
division of friends.


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Girl: When we get married,
I want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden.

Boy: It’s very kind of you,
darling, But I don’t have any worries or troubles.

Girl: Well that is because we aren’t married yet.


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


A girl & boy were sitting alone,
that boy started touching de girl,

Girl : dont touch me, all this only after marriage.

Boy : ok call me when u r married.


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


In art gallery couple sees
picture of a girl covered by leaf.
Husband keeps watching.

Wife: ab chalo gay ya PAT JHARR
ka intezar kertay raho gay.


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


A person who surrenders when he’s WRONG,
is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE,
is WISE.
A person who surrenders even if he’s RIGHT,
is a HUSBAND.!


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


If I was an artist,
you would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
you would be my inspiration!
If I was an author you would be my story!

But I’m only a cartoonist!


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


What is the difference between
a woman and a magnet?

Magnets have a positive side!




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 14


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Great Calculation: Only 20% boys have brains.
So what do the rest have?
.
.
.
.
.
They have girl friends:p


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?

Son : Not much dad,
just a radio with a sports car around it.



  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


A love letter from biscuit maker:
Dear marie, today is good day,
u r anmol for me…
but u have crack jacked my heart,
bcoz i have a little heart,
now i m in 50/50 position…


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


What does ILU means?

I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu…
tum kya samjhey they…
I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Difference between Husband & gadha.

Ans:Husband gadha ban sakta hai,
but
Gadha itna bhi gadha nahi k husband bane!!


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


One day Raja and rani
decided to send messages
to each other by using
Pigeon instead of mobile.
The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.
He angried and called to rani.
She told stupid “This was a missed call”


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Girls are like phones.
We like to be held
and talked too-
but if u press the
wrong button
u’ll be disconnected!


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Teacher To Student:

Can You Define Who Is LECTURER?

Student : A LECTURER Is A Person Who Has A Very Bad
Habit Of Speaking When Someone Is SLeeping.




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 13


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------



If u have 1 father, call me.
If u have 2 fathers, sms me.
If u have 3 fathers, miss call me.
If i m your father, just ignore this message.


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Commerce professor asks the student:
what is the most important source
of finance for starting business?

Student: “Father in law”.


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Son: Mom, when I was on the bus
with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.

Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy’s lap.


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


I just feel u….

Whenever I feel u….
I just miss u …..
Whenever i miss u ….
I just wanna See u ….
Do u know why…….

It’s juts because …………
******I LOVE CARTOONS****


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


A Solid reason for having 2 girlfriends at one time:
Monopoly is always damaging
&
Competition improves service!


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Send me SMS on these time

Morning
6am To 12pm

Noon
12pm To 4pm

Evening
4pm To 8pm

Night
8pm To 6am

Baki Time Tang Mat Karna
Kam Karna Hota Hai 


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Who let you get on the horse
You witch’s child?
.
.
.
.
Can’t understand?
.
.
.
.
.
Tenu ghori kinnay charhaya bhootni k…:p:d





FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 12


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Whenever going to meet your girlfriend
Make sure u have your cell phone..
n
when u r in deep trouble
keep your cell phone silent…


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Can u dance?
?
?
?
No!
.
.
.
Sure
.
.
.
Just try it
.
.
.
Sure u cant
.
.
.
That means u r pappu!!!
.
.
.
Because pappu cant dance ..


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Teacher: How Do You Differentiate
“WIFE” & “MOTHER”

SARDAR:
Before Marriage We Sleep With “MOTHER”
&
After Marriage
We Sleep With Our “WIFE”


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Sumeone Kills AMIR’S GF
& He Loses His Memory.
Than He Tries To Find out D Killer.
Suspense:AMIR Himself Is D Killer.
Now Enjoy Watchng GHAJINI 


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Teacher: what is meant by
“I MISS YOU”
.
.
.
.
Pathan: Is ka matlab hai
“Mein tumhari miss hon!”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


When a girl falls down
She is helped by so
Many people
But
When a boy falls down
Everybody laughs

When a girl licks
Her lips
She is thirsty
When boy licks
His lips
He is tharki

When a girl smiles
She is considered cute
When a boy smiles
He is flirt

Still people say
This is men’s world


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Judge: why r u arrested?
Sardar: for shopping early?
Judge: well, that’s not a crime,
anyway how early were u shopping?

Sardar: before opening the shop…..:p


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
That u were sending me
Jewelry and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw
your dad paying the bill !!!




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 11






  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


*Love b4 Marriage*
Janu…tum nahe to mei nahe,
mei nahe to tum nahe…

*Love after Marriage*
“baghairta”…Aj tu nahe ya me nahe


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


U are a BITCH

Beautiful
Intelligent
Talented
Cute
Hilarious

r u smiling now?
?
?
?
*YOU ARE REALLY BITCH*



  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


UNIVERSAL TRUTH :

When girls wear tight fittings,
Neither they are
Comfortable

Nor

Boys are comfortable…. !!


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------



In our life time
6 things can come at any time:
1.love
2.friendship
3.money
4.death
5.illness
-
-
-
6.susu: isliye karke sona .



  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


What was GOD’s First Reaction
when he made a Negro(African)?

Socho…

Dont know..

Oh! shit jal gaya!!


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Girlfriend:It’s 2 tight
Boyfriend:Don’t worry,I’ll put it slowly,

Girlfriend:Push it in,
Boyfriend:Ah..I can’t,

Girlfriend:It’s painful,
Boyfriend:Forget it.
.
.
.
.
We’ll buy new WEDDING RING!


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai.
Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


An Aeroplane asks a Rocket
How is that you can fly so fast?
The Rocket replies you will know the pain
when they put fire at your back!




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 10


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


A man was telling his neighbor,
?I just bought a new hearing aid.
It cost me four thousand dollars,
but it?s state of the art. It?s perfect.?

?Really,? answered the neighbor .
?What kind is it??
MAN:?Twelve thirty.?


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


I always think about U.
I can’t live without U.
I really need U.
I’m totally mad about U.
I just wanna be with U.
I’m very desperate for U.
I’m crazy 4 U.
I wanna marry U.
I LOVE U.
That’s all what my mama say to me:p


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


If:-
R u emotionally dumbed
Creatively challenged?
Artistically void?
Socially hopeless?
And financially desperate?

Congrats you are a
PAKISTANI!


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Choose four

Select three

Love two

And

Marry one


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


On Ur Single Smile Thousands People Die So

Keep Smiling n

Reduce Population Of PAKISTAN

But.

Never Smile In Front Of Da Mirror

Warna

Lene K Dene Par Jayen Gay.


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Aik Pagal: “Mujhe Katrina ne shadi k lye haan bol di hai”

Doosra: “Dikha di na usne apni auqat.
Main bhi itni asani se tallaaq nahi dunga.” 


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


a girl’s speaking 2 a boy……..
u r very handsome.
u r very cute.
u r very sweet.
ooph…….sorry.
i can’t call u sweet….
because ants will finish u.


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 9


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Theif entered kitchen

Santa: Look a thief has entered our kitchen
and he is eating the cake I made.

Banta: Whom should I call now,
Police or Ambulance?


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


TERROR JOKE -
What will happen
if u throw an AMPLIFIER into the sea?
TSUNAMI will be created
since an amplifier converts
small waves into bigger wave.


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Life is nothing without LOVE,
Love is emotion & Kiss is practical,
don’t get emotional, yar just b practical
So STOP loving and START Kissing.


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


5 points that prove you are a normal student

1:unnecessary talk on phone and messages
2:Plan each day to study but end of the day KAL SAY PAKA
3:you have all the data but you work before the dead line
4:right now you are thinking of forwarding this message to your friends
5:on each point you smile because it’s true.


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


When I open my eyes every morning
I pray to God that everyone should
have a friend like you….
Why should only i suffer!!! ha ha ha


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Hi i am marrying next week
there will be a small party and
only few persons will be invited
Hey don’t bring any gift
just bring SOMEONE to marry me.


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Sardar: Will U marry , after I die.
Wife : No I will live with my sister.

Wife : Will U marry , after I die.
Sardar: No I will also live with ur sister.


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Future plans of childrens:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Adnan: I want 2 b a pilot.
Wakeel: I want 2 b a doctor.
Bina: I want 2 b a good mother.
Shariq : I want 2 help Bina.



FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 8


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Mr.Bean Science
.
Major Rohail:
I was stuck in ELEVATOR for 3 hrs
Due to electric failure

Mr.Bean:
Ya me too
I was stuck on ESCALATOR for 5 hrs


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


u r…
A B C D E F G H I J K L

A=Aachhe

B=Briliant

C=Cool

D=Dashing

E=Emotional

F=Fantastic

G=Great

H=Hot

I=Intelligent

&
JKL=Joke Kaisa Laga.


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Cricket is getting excited day by day with the introduction of ICL n T20…

Same rules should be applied in Examz!

(1) Exams Timing Should Be Reduced To One Hour.

(2) Power Play – No Invigilator In Exam Hall For 1st 15 mins.

(3) Cheer Leaders – To Dance After Every Right Answer Written.

(4) Strategic Time-Out – Time For Students For Discussion.

(5) Super Over – Chance For Students To Form Their Own Question. 


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


God thought that since
he couldn’t b everywhere
he made a mother.

Then devil thought that
he couldn’t be everywhere
he made a mother-in-law.


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


I have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can’t send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I’m sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
“You are so beautiful”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?

Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


A ship was sinking.
Captain: Does any one know how to pray?
A priest comes forward and says he can pray.
Captain: Ok priest, you pray;
Everyone else in ship will wear a life jacket
as we are one jacket short.


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


2 men were searching for their lost wife in a festival.
Banta: What does your wife look like?
Santa: She is 5'7?, 36-24-36 sexy figure,
fair, sweet, beautiful, green sexy eyes, brown hair, and yours?

Banta: Forget mine, let us look for yours.






FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 7


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Breaking News
ATM @ karol bagh Is Jammed &
Not In Working Condition
.
.
.
Because
.
.
.
Sardar’s Wife Put Hair pin In Machine
When It Said”, Enter Ur PIN” 


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Boy1:Meet my wife Tina
Boy2.Oh! I know her
Boy1:How?
Boy2:v were caught sleeping together
Boy1:What the hell?
Boy2.during lecture in maths class

Think +ve:)


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


jeevan me paise, pyaar, dost,
sab kuch aata hai jaata hai,
par tode gaye daant phir nhi aate,
samajhdar ho ummeed hai msg bhejte rahoge.


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a vehicle

If 1 punctures, the vehicle can’t move further

M0ral:
always Keep a SPARE TYRE….


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Worlds shortest jokes:

1) 2 Women r sitting quiet.

2) 2 Sardars r playing chess.

3) GirlFriend pays the bill…!!!

Need more???

U r beautiful.:-P


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


A young girl after her honeymoon
came fully exhausted and tired,

When her friends asked her what happened?

She replied :
When this 70 year old bastard told me
he has saved a lot from last 50 years,

“I thought It was MONEY”


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


TEACHER:
what is the different between
problem and challenge????

STUDENT:3boys+1girl=problem
1boy+3girls=challenge..




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 6


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


A newly married girl got first class in her B.Ed exams. Her husband sent telegram to her parents – Ruby First Class in Bed!


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Hum ho gaye tumhare tumhe sochne k bad,
Ab na daikhen gay kisi ko tumhe daikhne k bad,

Dunya chor dain gai tumhai chorne k bad,
KHUDA! Maaf kare itne jhut bolne k bad


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Aaj kuch ghabraaye se lagte ho,
Thand se kuch kap-kapaaye se lagte ho,
Nikhar kar aayi hai soorat aapki,
BAHUT DINO KE BAAD NAHAAYE SE LAGTE HO..


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


A Sardar saw a Beautiful Girl,he Went and Kissed her.
Girl: “STUPID what r u doing?”
Sardar: B.Com final year”


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Log ishq kartay hain baray shor kay sath,
Humne bhi kia bare zor kay sath,
Lakin ab karain gay thoray ghor kay sath,
Kyunke kal usay dekha kisi aur kay sath.


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
so I would be in ur hands allday.

Husband: I too wish that u were
a newspapers so I could have
a new one everyday.


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Jab barish hoti hai, Tum yaad aate ho.
Jab kali ghata chaye, Tum yaad ate ho,

Jab bheegte hain tum yaad aate ho,
Bataoo Meri umbrella Kab wapis kro ge!


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 5


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Impact of Movies:

Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?

Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Sardar on phone:

Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now.

Doctor: Is this her first child?

Sardar: No this is her husband speaking…


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


One boy went to meet his girlfriend
when he came back at home
mom asked
kahaan gaey they ?
boy:us se milney
mom: kis liye?
boy: haan bohat kiss liye:D


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


A man to Santa:
Your friend is kissing your wife in your home.
Santa rushes home and came back within
half an hour and slapped the man
and said:
“He’s not my friend.”


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked “what you did till evening?”
Sardar :”Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


I always think about U.
I can’t live without U.
I really need U.
I’m totally mad about U.
I just wanna be with U.
I’m crazy 4 U.
I wanna marry U.
I LOVE U.

Aisa mujhe bajuwali kehti hai…
(My neighbour say all this to me)


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Who was d 1st indian cricktr 2 Bcum captain in his 1st mtch,score century in d same mtch &hit a 6 of d last ball 2 defeat england? AAMIR KHAN in LAGAAN


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Jis waqt khuda ne tumhain banaya hoga,
ek saroor sa uske dil pe chaya hoga…
pehle socha hoga tujhe jannat mein rakh lun..
phir ussay zoo ka khayal aaya hoga…




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 4


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


koi chez be-wafai se barh ker kia hogi,
Ghum-e-tanhai judai se barh ker kia hogi,

Kisi ko deni ho jawani main saza,
to wo saza PARHAI se barh ker kia hogi:-)


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


A scientist cannot b a president,but kalam did it.
A conductor cannot b a superstar,but Rajini did it.
A monkey cannot operate mobile,
but u mere lal, mind blowing….. (u did it)


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Doctor to sardar : You will die within 2 hours.
Do you want to see any one before you die?
Sardar : Yes. A good doctor.


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in
the line said: I’ve seen ur password. It’s ****.
Sant: U r wrong. It’s 1394.


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?”
Millionaire: “I owe everything to my wife.”

Interviewer: “Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: “What were you before you married her?”
Millionaire: “A Billionaire”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Question : Why do girls close
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess…
Guess
.
.
.
Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Sardar was busy removing
a wheel from his auto.
A man asks sardar why are
you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board.
Parking is only for 2 wheeler




FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 3


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------



twinkle Twinkle little star,
teri girl friend gaye bazar,

us ko mil gaya MAJNO ka pyar,
ab tu beth ker makhiyan maaar


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Love is possible after friendship
but
friendship is not possible after love
because
medicines work before death
later nothing can be cured….!!!


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------

A girl ask to moulvi! can i kiss a man?
moulvi says: astaghfirullah! astaghfirullah!

girl: can i kiss a boy?
moulvi: laahulawala quwata………

girl: can i kiss u?
moulvi: Bismillahh bismillah


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Don’t worry, I have a one more.


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Kehdo un parhne walon se,
Kabhi hum bhi parha kertay thay,
Jitna syllabus parh k wo top kertay hain,
Utna to hum choice per chor dia kertay thay,


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Who‘s hot… Its U,
Who‘s
Charming… Its U,
Who‘s
Sweetest.. Its U,
Who‘s
Intelligent… Its U,
Who‘s dear & near friend… Its U
Who‘s a liar.. Its me


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


On a romantic day sardar’s girlfriend asks him,
“Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring?”
Sardar : “Ya sure, from landline or mobile”.


  -----------------------------------(8)----------------------------------


Hey friend remember that
without stupidity there can be no wisdom
& without ugliness there can be no beauty
so the world needs YOU after all!





FUNNY SMS MESSAGES PAGE 2


  -----------------------------------(1)----------------------------------


Human brain is the most
outstanding object in world.
It functions 24 hours a day,
365 days a year.
It functions right from the time we are born,
and stop only when we enter the examination hall.


  -----------------------------------(2)----------------------------------


Catch her by her waist…
Bring her home..
Keep ur hand on her neck
Put ur lips on her lips
& have a …
…nice drink…PEPSI


  -----------------------------------(3)----------------------------------


Someday you may lose your hair.
you may lose your teeth- oyur money & even lose your mind.
But 1 thing you will never loose is oyur good looks.
because you cant lose what you don’t have!


  -----------------------------------(4)----------------------------------


Baharo phool barsao mera “DOST”aya hai.
Hoto pe muskan, gali me mehak laya hai.

Barso tak thi jise pani se “ELERGY”
Woh aaj “LUX” se nahaya hai.


  -----------------------------------(5)----------------------------------


Yash Johar is producing a new film
& is searching 4 new talent.
I’ve suggested ur name.
Pls go & meet him.
The movie’s name is “AQAL HO NA HO”


  -----------------------------------(6)----------------------------------


Wife:-I will die.
Husband:- I will also die.

Wife:-why will you die?
Husband:-because main itni khushi
bardasht nahin ker sakta:D


  -----------------------------------(7)----------------------------------


Promise me we are true friends
I am lamp you are light
I am Coke you are Sprite
I am Sawan you are badal
I am Normal you are Pagal
I am Water you are Tanki
I am Tarzan you are Monkey



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